We are getting married!!!

We have picked a date!

August 22, 2009 @ 6:30 PM

Oh, the dreams!

I love that feeling of being other worldly. You know when you have been writing for hrs, have to come back to "reality". Man, it's hard to go from a magical place to the real world. At the same time, there is such magick here.

Here in a few moments I leave for the mountains with my family to see the Aspens changing. What incredible magick our creator has done in giving us the wonder of each season to enjoy.

I imagine that I will find inspiration, either in writing, drawing/painting, or photography in the beauty I am about to enjoy.

I am so thankful for my artistic soul. I am eternally grateful that the magick I was supposed to follow wasn't mathmatics! I always sucked in that. At least I have the gift of enjoying those things that fill my soul. A mountain side filled with color, my children's eyes as they enjoy the wonder of it all, the passion of a wonderful man by my side.

So, blessed, so very blessed!

I love the beautiful worlds that live inside my mind, but I enjoy greatly the incredible dream of living life, of seeing it's beauty in all that is around me.

What dreams!

My Muse

I really wish I could just see her. That ghost of inspiration that passes through my mind on so many occasions. I want to thank her for the many dreams, ideas, moments of passion in my mind, that I have seen come to fruition on screen and paper.

There are very few days now that she has come back that I don't touch the keyboard, or a pen. I have to! Can't live without those moments of touching the very depths of my soul, and in doing so, hopefully touching others as well.

I am so grateful for this need to write. As my words finally flow again, my heart fills, my soul lives again. It's happening so fast now, this writing what I love!

Writing...my release

The only way I know to explain my need to write is like the need to make love. It's a burning, almost unbearable feeling that expands and grows as it leads up to that moment of Ah. When it's down, and it's right, it's so very right.

So, those days that my fingers don't touch a keyboard, or pen and notebook, I feel bereft. Like I have missed out on a most integral part of who I am.

Oh, and then there are the days the I don't get to touch a book. I have really busy days with homeschooling six children, making a home, the children's lessons hither and yon, my moments with words are stolen. This makes it even better, because it's clandestine. You know, like those moments when you first meet the love of you life. How it takes your breath away. Your heart pounds, you knees feel like they are made of gelatin, and sometimes it's almost painful! Okay, maybe reading isn't that good in and of itself, but I am a out of the closet bibliophile, aka book worm! AND I get to claim it's research, that way I don't feel guilty for that being the thing I do at the moment instead of, oh...say, the laundry!

So, as I sign off for now, I am taking my beautiful homeschooling children to the Nature Center, so that while they run around, I can indulge in my guilty pleasure...Writing and Reading!

Oh, how life changes!

The last six years were pure hell. The morning my husband and I chose to get on that motorcycle will stand out in my mind till the day I die.

We had everything going for us. A beautiful home, outstanding children that I spent my days with homeschooling, a strong business, and many friends that had our same beliefs. I also had networked enough to have my writing career taking off. Having been included in Debra White Smith's book How to Romance Your Husband, I was well on my way to getting things going! I was so excited about the chance to follow my dreams. I had made connections with important people, had several articles published. IT was about to happen for me. That all ended when one man chose not to obey that stop sign. In seconds my life changed forever. My husband was gone, and it all fell on my shoulders

From that moment on, I had to struggle just to learn how to walk again. When the doctors told me it would take up to 6 years for the head trauma to heal, I thought I could beat it. However, I soon discovered, I couldn't even read, let alone do the writing I loved. I would look at a book and the letters would swim, the words would make no sense. My heart ached to be able to just escape the loss for a few hours in someplace wonderful. I couldn't even have that.

As time went by, things got a little better, but I would still loose track of what I was saying in the middle of a conversation. I would have to ask the person I was talking to what I had been saying. I would try to put my thoughts on paper, but the words just wouldn't come.

For four years that was my struggle. Then slowly, it became somewhat better. Some days were worse than others. Then I would have a few good ones and just devour words. Books are more sacred to me than ever. There is no way to explain the loss unless you are a wordsmith and have been there.

Today I can actually use the gift I was given. You know, that gift of gab! I am so blessed, so completely thrilled that my mind has come back to me. That today I can sit at this computer and tell my story, hopefully encouraging someone else who may be struggling. Whether it's writers block, or something more tragic, never give up! If that passion for writing lives inside of you, hold on to it. It may be the one dream that keeps you going when it seems like the valley may never end.

Blessings